WhiteTail Wrestling

Welcome everyone to Monday Night RAW it’s uncooked, uncut and uncensored. The show starts with Sean Mooney and Bobby Heenan outside the Manhatten Center with Heenan unable to gain attendance because we are sold out. We are then introduced to the commentary team Vince McMahon is joined by Macho Man Randy Savage and comedian Rob Bartlett.

The first match in the history of RAW features the undefeated Yokozuna against the bird man Koko B Ware. Bartlett spends the match making fat jokes about Yoko which of course would not be allowed today some of these jokes were cringeworthy others I thought worked. Koko could not knock Yoko down no matter how he tried and when he missed a running move Yoko destroyed him with a leg drop a splash in the turnbuckle follows and then the banzai drop puts Koko out of his misery. Impressive squash win for Yokozuna.

Bobby Heenan discusses the yet to debut Narcissus who would later be revealed as Lex Luger Heenan claims he is more perfect than Mr Perfect. We then get to see the highlight of this episode of RAW with the Steiner brothers squashing a couple of jobbers. A Steiner squash match is usually a joy to watch and this match is no exception with both Scott and Rick destroying their opponents with heavy duty power moves and then finally winning after the top rope bulldog. Another highpoint of this match was Rob Bartlett calling Doink the clown who was clowning around ringside and in the crowd Dork the clown, Vince agrees with him and calls the clown Dork himself before quickly correcting his mistake.

Sean Mooney is outside the building again with a women trying to gain entrance to the building who claims to be the Aunt of Rob Bartlett this woman is quickly revealed as Bobby Heenan in drag and this second attempt at entering into the Manhatten Center fails. Boring Razor Ramon promo about attacking Owen Hart and his Royal Rumble title match against Bret Hart. Tatanka talks about the headlock for hangover raising money for charity.

Shawn Michaels defends his Intercontinental title against Max Moon in an average match with no real memorable moments. HBK wins with a back suplex which was his finisher pre sweet chin music. During this match we get Bartlett pretending to be Mike Tyson who is apparently watching RAW from solitary confinement. The Royal Rumble report with Mean Gene Okerlund is next with Mean Gene discussing some of the matches and participants in the 30 man Royal Rumble match with some of the wrestlers cutting quick promos. More Sean Mooney and Bobby Heenan with the Brain disguising himself as a Rabbi this time.

The final match of the night is an Undertaker squash with the Deadman winning after the Tombstone. Doink (or is it Dork) is at ringside with McMahon who mentions to the clown that Crush wants him to stop behaving the way he has been. Doink claims his aim is to make children cry and make himself laugh. Crush comes out and chases him around the ring. The show ends with Heenan finally gaining entrance to the building.

A fun easy to watch first episode of RAW with the 45 minute run time on demand being perfect for an episode of TV wrestling. The matches themselves were mostly squashes but they served their purpose in getting over the winners. The promos and some of the other content wasn’t the best. I enjoyed the commentary although some of the comedy lines by Bartlett would not fly today with some people.

Wrestler Points

The Steiner Brothers – 2

The Steiner’s were entertaining in their squash match with some great power moves and the top rope bulldog which to this day is one of my favorite double team finishers.

Yokozuna – 1

The 500 pound monster completely destroyed Koko B Ware in the opener looking unbeatable which at this stage of his WWF run he was.

Shawn Michaels – 1

The Heart Break Kid defended his Intercontinental title in a match with Max Moon. Not the most exciting match but it secured a title defense against his former tag partner and now rival Marty Janetty at the Royal Rumble.

The Undertaker – 1

The Deadman gets a main event win against the jobber Demento.